I have read many comments that put the blame on the SO who has the issue with the pet. Dog people will try to tell you that you shouldnt mind having your life covered in fur, but folks like you and me arent trying to hear that nonsense. Sounds like your partner is a narcissist, please join a narcissist support group on Facebook and check for yourself. Wanted to make my partner happy. He gets along with the cats, he is potty trained, he loves fetch, and he doesnt have to sleep on the bed. He had me promise that I would train a new one as well as I did my last. Then you have the ones who have damn near accused me of animal cruelty because we crate our dog when we have guests. Now I have been VERY clear about where I stand with her dog. Ive compromised a lot of my wants and dreams for my husband but this one almost feels a step too far, as daft as that may sound. I just needed to vent and be honest somewhere. I want to be able to invite friends and family over to our house, and I just want a clean house and quality time with my husband together! I like dogs but I cant deal with this anymore. One study found that the average dog causes 2,000 arguments in his or her lifetime. She should get the hint very quickly. Thought if I could help train, it would turn out okay. I hope she gets cancer like her mother did and dies early. This has helped me understand the situation. He moved to a condo and let me stay in the house. After the last two pass we needed to be dog free. You are being neglected and neglect is a form of abuse. !.my brother had a beautiful border collie which he allowed to get bored and she started to round up the neighbours children.he was going to get her put to sleep so I took her in.shes a fabulous dog and I love her to bits.my boyfriend hates her however and now doesnt want to move in with me because of the hair,the smell,the noise etcIm guttedreally devastated.what should I do? Compromise does not work if you are asking someone to tolerate something they cant stand. Hahahaha to funny & true! He wasnt over the moon about my dog but he grew to tolerate and even help out if I would be home late from work or out for the day. You can judge a mans true character by the way he treats his fellow animals. -Paul McCartney. The dog doesnt know a leash nor rules. Human loyalty is as malleable as clay and frankly I find it pathetic that so many people turn their noses up at these facts because they refuse to acknowledge that were basically ticking biological machines such as they are. She was removed. IMO dogs are pack animals and do better in family situations anyway, so being forced into a solitary situation with one single person creates a LOT of anxiety and behavior problems (aka, like your girlfriends dog). My dog ran out the room first and me second. Ive yet to see a site that discusses the possibility that dog fanatics people who worship their pets as baby humans, rather than those who enjoy their dogs as pets may have issues, and that those issues are health neither for pets, their owners, or their real-world relationships. Wow. If your significant other is so inconsiderate that they tolerate an out of control dog, so rude that no one can have fun when the dog is around, then that is a character flaw of that person. Of course, hes noseblind to it and thats something that wont go away. I finally had to put her to sleep and say goodbye. Is he a narcissist since he has isolated you from friends and now your furry friends? I have recently been given an ultimatum to give up him or the dogs. You just cannot argue with extreme pet lovers, it is like there is something wrong with us for not embracing and loving all of this. For more information, please see our The dog smell is what gets to me and makes me nauseous! I hope I dont meet another one! Other considerations: Give some extra attention to the dog. I know you arent obligated to care for a dog that isnt yours, but it would help you bond with the dog. I have been married for over a year and living with my hubby for over 3 years. Most of all, they are not allowed to be DOGS! Unless hes just being an ass, then maybe you should reconsider staying with your partner. But he would rub the dogs back abd love on her back before he evens thinks of me. she barks like mad everytime she hears someone outside or when we have visitors coming through the door, even if its someone she knows ,and two minutes later shes all over the visitors like a rash lapping up the attention, also when we walk in town she is really nervous, shakes, unexpectedly twirls around sometimes nearly knocking me over. for 4 years. First thing we noticed was that the dog was super timid, but we figured it was just that the dog was in a new place, new owners, new environment, etc. She didnt beg or whine constantly. What should I do? Since he never had kids, he says that his dog is the kid he never had. Dogs need attention , training and affection. The dog recently bit a groomer (had to get stitches) and also viciously attacked my foot while I was trying to get my dogs toy away from him (he destroys toys instead of playing with them). I actually use to really enjoy his dogs company, but ever since my fianc and I moved in together (this being our first time living together), I see things a little bit more clearly when it comes to the dog. We are both big-time dog people and love being around furry friends. Ive always had dogs so I know how to train them from puppies & I believe in boundaries with pets. He became like a child to me. There is no way you need to treat an animal like that. So, puzzle toys are an excellent way to ease the boredom in dogs, especially in puppies. THEY ARE A ANIMAL, just like COWS, DEER, and SHEEP!!!! He goes back to the other house he would love them. As humans we are supposed to have some capacity of having emotional responses to animals that are completely different to those that we have of people! Myself and my partner have been in a relationship for just over a year. They just dont get the socialization they need-especially in winter. He would stop talking to me just to pick her up because she always wants him attention specially when he talks, gets close or even awknowledge me. i just wanted him to be put out in the living room for tonight so maybe i could sleep..and maybe we could cuddle for five minutes before you sleep..why do u think i hate the dog..honestly if you dont get him training he is going to end up hurting my baby and may end up getting put down is that what you want? They will let the human go because they can control the dog. Omg, Im so happy I found this forum. If you hate your spouses animals, you should leave. My wife and I have disagreements about our dogs, but in the end its resolved because we have boundaries. So, yesterday, I got the shock of my life. Thank you all. If you cant be bothered to put in the time to make that happen, then dont get a partner because its not fair on them. She is not misbehaved whatsoever. I know what it feels like to be second to the dog. So Im resentful that I cant have those cuddly mornings with my bf any more. Jennifer: I actually feel much better that I out of that situation. They think its ok to be controlling but dont like it when that is challenged for good reasons. To the guy with the Puppy Pitt whos wife cages the puppy. And my boyfriend doesnt like spending time at my place so were always at his and my dog isnt aloud. Maybe it would be easier to see our side of people as well than just bash us and tell us to take the high road. When I dont stay over for a day or two and return I can see the dog has been sleeping on my side of the bed. Anyways, my solution to that problem when it happened was Im very sorry, I really do love you, but I also love him, and he was here first. Consult a veterinarian: Meet your veterinarian right away and seek advice and take necessary actions. But for now my house is a slight zoo. Dear, reading your post made me so sad. I dont want to have to take a back seat because of two needy dogs. His bed and couch are covered in hair. I dont know why people like that breed. Recently, she has taken up chewing on the coffee table. Amen this is so true y cant everyone understand this. If your dog is habituated to barking all over the day, this can be the reason why does your husband/boyfriend needs to rehome the dog. Then in October she said that she would put in an effort to get him a new homeover five months later she has done nothing to find the dog a new home. Its just something that requires compromise and the one I was with wasnt willing to do that and in the end, if shes not willing to compromise there then shes not willing to compromise at life as a real couple. Its on counters and in the fridge and in our food and even makes it into rooms where shes not allowed. I know the situation is not helped by my depression and anxiety so Ive booked a session with a counsellor but I seriously dont know how to get past this. All rights reserved. If its the relationship that is also at issue since this aspect of her personality never was previously know, is there someone that can keep the pet while you change your financial situation? And we have now been fighting constantly for a month now just about Bobbi! He promised me he would take her downstairs to sleep in his parents bed but tonight he just got into bed and started cuddling her and refused to take her down. Tying the damn creature to a pole doesnt help, because the stupid creature keeps trying to kill itself on the leash as it tries to struggle out of it. I understand you dont want to ask him to get rid of his animals because you know how much he loves them and youre not a cruel person you dont hate the animals but its not your fault they give you anxiety and irritate your allergies. Its not her, its him. He would not survive the winter. If your dog has separation anxiety that leads to peeing and pooping all over the house, chewing things, and being destructive, perhaps this can be the reason why does your husband/boyfriend needs to rehome the dog. Shes a decently trained dog though, she knows to do her business outside, she listens after the third time you tell her and for the most part is well mannered. That was a great idea thanks and my husband and I bedroom are at peace again. She literally reduces the home value, all so she can run around and beg for food. Here it is at 4 in the morning and Beau just got up out of his bed for some reason and his nails were clicking on the hardwood floor. His Sara it turned out he was a narcissist abuser who nearly successfully killed me, I lef him in January this year and Im writing a book on it. The guy I am with hates dogs with a bloody passion and I have THREE. 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